My Drunken Whoops

Here I sit in a surreal mist
Feeling a bit more than pissed
Why is that you rightly ask?
Cause I’m drunk and on my ass
What drove me to it you might wonder
To give me cause for such a blunder
One whiskey down but I like two
And maybe just a beer or few
Then my sober loyal friend
Pushed me down I did offend
When his wife who looked so sweet
Rejected my offered treat
He hit my face then my gut
Now I’m down and in a rut.
How was I supposed to know
Her little panties were not for show
Then I went and called her cute
His bad remarks were quite astute.
He took me home and I took a shower
That’s why I’m here at this hour
I swear I’ll never drink again
That damn bottle’s not my friend

Author Notes

7 Comments for “My Drunken Whoops”


The sad tales of a drunken night out…lol Hope he learned his lesson. Seems not, as he says he’ll never drink again. That is usually the biggest laugh of all! A fun read. 🙂

Write On!

Anisa Claire


Hey Tim,

Hahaha. Yep… that sure would get a person in trouble, no question. Fun poem. Your first two rhymes seemed a bit forced, but then the rest of the poem read in pretty good rhythm.

Good stuff!


Karen Holt


Hi Tim, this one created hilarious imagery and it made me chuckle. A deft touch and tongue firmly in cheek, you still made me feel your chagrin. We’ve all drank a few too many… a good reminder of why it never ends well 🙂 Karen

charles stone


Tim, nice one. Yep, alcohol has ended more friendships than a few. I like the music and vibe to this piece. But I didn’t get the “took me home and in the shower” line. Write on.

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