Epiphany Me

So, this post isn’t a story, or a poem, or even a blog.  It’s about me.

Almost all my life I’ve been overweight.  Almost all my adult life, I’ve been classified as “Morbidly Obese.”  Those are not easy words to hear, and they somehow got even harder to read on a page.  Did it help much in the weight loss effort?  No.  Or at least not enough.

No, I’m not any more comfortable discussing my weight and size than I have been (I never have been).  Mostly, I’m writing this to celebrate a little for some successes I’ve had, results of efforts made, but also so there’s a record.  To hold myself accountable for my actions.

I’ve tried various diets, and even, on occasion, posted about my efforts to lose weight and be healthier here.  I’ve had weight loss surgery (lapband) and while it was a success for the first year or two, there were complications that arose, outside of my control, that caused the band not to work as it should have.  No, it’s not the band’s fault I gained all my weight back, it’s mine.  I accept that responsibility head on.

No, it’s not the diet’s fault, all of those I’ve tried: Atkins, Weight Watchers, Sugar Busters, Diabetic, etc, that I gained the weight back- it’s mine.

So what’s new this time?  What about this effort is going to be different than before?

Really it’s many things.  I turned 41 last year.  In February of this year (2016) I realized I’m about to turn 42.  I’ve been severely overweight for many years, and it’s bad enough that I could say I’m living on borrowed time.  Do I want to see my daughter graduate high school?  Yes.  Do I want to walk her down the isle someday?  Yes.  Do I want to play with my grandkids?  Yes.  Do I want to be able to enjoy the outside things I like to do like fishing, camping, photography, and just life in general?  Yes.  Am I tired of feeling tired all the time, getting stared at when going out to eat, or to a movie?  Yes.  Do I want to be a better me?  Yes, Yes, and YES!

In those moments, something clicked.  Not like before, but different.  I didn’t feel uncertain about what I wanted to do.  I didn’t see it as work, or an uphill battle.  I saw it as making some changes to make me a better me.

So, with the help and support of my wife, Gwen, we began.  On February 12th, we started eating a lower carb lifestyle.  We have bread or a potato maybe once a week.  Fruit only in the morning.  Veggies, lean meat, cheese, that comprises our day.  I walk daily.  On my “rest day” I still get out and walk, it’s just a shorter one.  On my “I can” day, that’s when I have that potato, or a spoon of rice.

Not only have I had a much easier time sticking to this new lifestyle, but I find I enjoy it.  I’m getting out there, I’m moving, and I like seeing the results.  I track protein, carbs, fat, and calories daily.  I drink at least 70 oz, water a day.  And I weigh in each week.  Today, March 27th, I’ve lost 30 lbs so far.

Yes, I know I have a ways to go, but I know I’ll get there.  The best part is, this time I’m enjoying the ride.  Yay Me!!

 


Author Notes

4 Comments for “Epiphany Me”

Dave Allen

says:

Tim, Terrific job! I’m impressed, and jealous. I’ve been trying to lose ten pounds for the past several months, and I’m just spinning my wheels. The fact that you’ve lost 30 speaks a lot to your ability to set a goal and follow through. Salud!

says:

I’m walking a similar path, Tim. It has to click in our mind. We have to want to do it. You are so lucky to have a faithful loving partner to share this journey with you, and you can support one another every day! Right now, I am doing a daily meditation with Oprah and Deepak Chopra titled, “Shedding the Weight”. All facets of our life need to be balanced, and our mind and thoughts, our “inner” self needs to be nourished as much as our bodies to create this balance. I am having successes and epic fails, but when the mind clicks and truly wants it, it can be done.

I wish you love and light on your journey! You are doing awesome!

Becky

says:

I won’t wish you luck or pat you on the back because you are doing what you promised. To love honour and cherish, not for as long as you don’t die early from over indulging; but for the rest of her life! You have to keep the one promise to her, the person who selfish I know doesn’t want to bury you. It is not a case of if it is a case of when You are done, you can eat small portions of everything you like, as long as exercise burns more than you eat.
So 30lb’s loss is fabulous you will be the man you want to be, go Tim. Take care and never give up or I will be back… x to show you even virtual friends care.

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